So, the issue of costumes. Sure, you can decide to go out only on the real night of Halloween, but we all know that’s not going to happen. You can wear the same torn, alcohol-stained costume all four nights, or you can wear the same sweaty, alcohol-stained outfit you wore to the Safety Dance (if you choose the latter option, restrict your 80s gear to only one night of Halloween. That ensemble is only going to get sweatier, and more disgusting). That being said, I have no real suggestions for costumes that I’m not employing myself, but unless you’re actually going to moonwalk all night, don’t be Michael Jackson — there will be someone doing it better. I am, however, a huge supporter of the slutty careerwoman costume in all its iterations!

If you’re going to try to be creative, you can use Chloe’s Guide to Safety Dance Costumes as a jumping off point. Additionally, the Costume Bazaar is a “5000 sq ft SHOWROOM!!!!” located at 1593 State Street. Extended hours for Halloween means that they’re open until 8:30 PM every night this week. Or if you’re really getting craftsy and need cheap feathers, rhinestones, cardboard, glitter paint, etc., Michael’s Art Supply is located at 170 Universal Dr. North in North Haven, CT. Good luck!

You just have to be more creative this year, kids. There are plenty of places to shop in Nuhaven, though you may have to sacrifice a bit of color variety and a pinch of ethical labor practice. You could even ditch the aerobics look and go for something classier like shoulder pads or a great hat.

Salvation Army is the classic, a hotbed for the classy-tacky thrift store find.

English Building Market has a carefully chosen selection; go for the sequins — or the fur.

American Apparel has every color spandex you could ever dream of, but if you show up wearing it I might make fun of you.

Urban Outfitters sells things that looks just like the things American Apparel sells, but it’s closer to campus. Duh.

The Shops on Chapel You’ve Probably Never Been In are recognizable by the tight lycra minidresses in the window, replete with chain details and maybe even lacing. Secret: they have wigs in the back.

The #1 Safety Dance destination, though, is Fashionista. Vintage store, or a grown-up version of DZ? Hard to tell, but you’ll find what you’re looking for: the 1980s, relived. (Or discovered! Sorry, 2013.)

Duran Duran, “Hungry Like a Wolf”
Bananarama, “Cruel Summer”
Cyndi Lauper, “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”
Bryan Adams, “Summer of ’69″
the Bangles, “Eternal Flame”
Cyndi Lauper, “Time After Time”
John Mellencamp, “Jack and Diane”
Toni Basil, “Mickey”
Eurythmics, “Sweet Dreams”
Bon Jovi, “Livin’ on a Prayer”
Jefferson Airplane, “We Built This City”
Bobby Brown, “My Prerogative”
Simple Minds, “Don’t You Forget About Me”
Tina Turner, “What’s Love Got to Do With It”
Janet Jackson, “Nasty”
Poison, “Every Rose Has Its Thorn”
Whitney Houston, “I Wanna Dance With Somebody”
the Bangles, “Walk Like an Egyptian”
Los Lobos, “La Bamba”
Men at Work, “Who Can It Be Now?”
Tiffany, “I Think We’re Alone Now”
Irene Cara, “What A Feeling”
Bruce Springsteen, “Dancing In the Dark”
Madonna, “Material Girl”
Nena, “99 Luftballons”
Wham!, “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”
Pat Benatar, “Love Is A Battlefield”
Rick Springfield, “Jessie’s Girl”
Kenny Loggins, “Footloose”
the Police, “Every Breath You Take”
Bonnie Tyler, “Total Eclipse of the Heart”
Tommy Tutone, “867-5309″
Air Supply, “All Out of Love”
Dexy’s Midnight Runners, “Come On Eileen”
Culture Club, “Do You Really Want to Hurt Me”
Styx, “Mr. Roboto”
The Go-Gos, “We Got the Beat”
Violent Femmes, “Blister in the Sun”
George Michael, “Faith”
Beastie Boys, “Fight For Your Right”
Prince, “When Doves Cry”